Let’s start with some good news: I’m not dead yet! I had to abandon all sorts of ships, run all the way home to my parent’s basement in Delmar, NY, turn the air purifier on high, slow way down, eat very carefully, hydrate like it was my job, rest like my life depended on it, but I’m finally recovering and actually feeling mostly ok again. Incredibly grateful about every piece of that, since for awhile there I wasn’t entirely sure I was coming out of this last adventure in one piece. This has led to some deep soul searching, a major pivot, plans for a very different kind of adventure – but more on that in a minute. Blessings on my parents for welcoming me home with open arms and hearts and giving me a safe space to breathe and pull myself together again.

Sitting in my tent up in the North Woods (hiding from giant swarms of the most voracious mosquitoes I have ever encountered!) with no WiFi and no ponies to take care of, nobody to talk to except for Thick, nothing to do but read and think, I did a lot of reading and thinking. I was thinking about my own mortality, as one does in these situations, and I asked myself “is there anything I regret not doing with my one wild and precious life?” If this isn’t the end, if I have a few more years left, what do I most want to do while I still can? The covered wagon adventure was one big lifelong dream, but it is obviously coming to an end. And I am apparently still alive. I can’t go back to Lopez, as beautiful as it is – I’m allergic to the mold and who knows what else up there – my doctor said I had to find another place to live if I wanted to keep living. Where to go? What to do? I’m half way through writing the next book (actually the prequel to the one I just published – there will be a sequel after – so 3 in total) and getting that finished is definitely a priority. Cindy and Ken have offered me the use of their cabin as a place to live and write and that’s obviously the next stop. I need to get the ponies and the wagon sold. The cabin is lovely, Thick is happy there, it feels like a no brainer. But I’m just not sure Indiana is my place? I mean, nothing personal, but it legit just tried to kill me. And as I sat there I realized that the one thing I regretted, looking back at my life, was not seeing more of this beautiful planet we call home. I’ve seen a lot of the continental United States, but it’s a big world out there.

First things first, I drove back to Wheaton to pick up a box of my books I’d ordered to sell from the wagon. My cousins were encouraging about my nascent travel plans and a bit “what are you waiting for!?” which was great. My uncles bought books to give to friends and family which was also great! I read the directions on my brand new gas mask. I texted Cindy and let her know I was on my way. I drove back to Desoto, Indiana avoiding all the tolls and highways. Indiana is beautiful, I’ll give it that. I had no preconceived notions about Indiana before I drove across the border from Ohio with the ponies, and first impressions were absolutely lovely. But the people who actually live there have got a lot of grit, I’m just going to tell you now.

A storm weveral months before had landed a tree on a corner of the cabin earlier in the summer. Unfortunately water had gotten in and since I was there last a bit of mold had started to grow behind the sink. I hit it with some bleach, but that didn’t seem to do the trick. By the next morning, I knew I was in trouble. Quick, quick change of plans. Phone home, mom and dad said “come home.” I didn’t want to leave. I love that cabin, I was looking forward to spending time with Cindy, getting to know a new friend for more than a day or two. I sorted through my gear, separating things that were going with the ponies, with the wagon, things getting left behind, coming with me. My new life was going to be mobile and streamlined and no sense bringing anything extra. Even with the gas mask I had a headache, my mouth tasted like metal, my digestion was off, my kidneys were aching again, I was struggling to think clearly, everything took way more energy that I had, I needed to go. I had planned on having the summer to get the ponies and the wagon sold. I had planned on having the summer to spend with Thick.

I got Thick when he was a 5 week old ball of fluff we called Puff Badger. He’s been my constant companion for the past 8 1/2 years. It took me a long time to really love him but he won me over and I fell hard. The wagon trip cemented the bond. He is such a great ambassador, a true extrovert and just expects everyone he meets to love him. And generally, they do! He took to wagon life like he was born for it. I’ve never had anyone in my life as devoted and constant as Thick. My next adventure is going to take me across an ocean. Flying across an ocean with a dog is prohibitively expensive, close to $10,000 – and traumatic, and then every border crossing becomes its own ordeal. I had already talked to Cindy, who was so smitten she’d been thinking about calling the local Corgi rescue to see what they had available . I knew Cindy and Ken would give him the very best life, with 18 acres and another dog to play with and Meathead the old Tom Cat that Thick had already made friends with. I knew they’d throw ball and give him all sorts of love and attention. It was a very good future life for Thick. But it wasn’t with me. This was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make in my life. I cried while I drove for two days straight, got home and I was still crying. I’m doing a little better now, but writing this more than six weeks later I’m crying again. The soggy crumpled kleenex have half-filled the trash can. It took me a week to get over the habit of being careful where I put my feet when I got up in the night, not wanting to step on him or wake him up. I hallucinated the sound of him snoring for days. I feel like I’m missing a part of myself. It hurts. And I still feel like I made the right decision for us both. I’m getting regular updates and he’s adapting to his new home beautifully and seems really happy. Oh, but the ache in my heart!!!

I had hoped to sell the ponies and wagon all as one unit, but apparently I am unique in my desire to cross the USA in a mini covered wagon in 2026. I started hearing from people interested in Theodore. Always Theodore. Occasionally both ponies together, which I was trying to prioritize. The ponies are staying at Shelly’s barn about 4 miles from Desoto and the cabin. There was a woman in Ohio that seemed like the absolute perfect home but it was going to take her over a week to be able to go see them. I told her I’d wait and started putting people on a list. Then – the rain started to fall. Not just any rain but a once in several lifetimes sort of flood with high winds that hit hard and huge – including right where the ponies were staying. Roads were closed. Bridges washed out. Houses and barns were wrecked. People died. I’m so incredibly grateful that I wasn’t out on the road in a tiny covered wagon with Thick and the ponies in that storm.

The aisles of the barn where the ponies are staying turned into rivers. The indoor arena turned into a swamp. Part of the roof on Shelly’s house blew away. The end of Cindy’s driveway and the beautiful meadow in front of the cabin were under water. This was going to take a while to get cleaned up. It’s still not cleaned up, but Shelly got her barn mucked out and the insurance men shown around and her husband to his surgery and still managed to find time to take videos of the ponies for prospective buyers. Speaking of angels. The woman from Ohio finally made it over to see the ponies, but Franklin was too small, Theodore was too tall, meanwhile, some of the people on the list had found other ponies – lesson learned! No matter how nice somebody is in messenger – haha. I gave up on going down the list in order and called a family who lived in the next town over. They were on vacation in Florida but would go meet the ponies the moment they got home. Apparently it was love at first sight between their little cowgirl and Theodore. They took him home the next morning and last I heard she was putting glitter in his mane! I’m really happy for them both. Theodore is the type of pony who needs a brave little girl in his life.

Franklin is still looking for his new home. He’s such a brilliant little driving pony with so much to give the right home. I’m a little protective of him because he has the kind of heart that once he bonds with somebody he’ll give them everything – there’s no quit in him. He’s fun to drive, easy to be around, well put together and the bravest equine I’ve ever met – of any size! He’s absolutely bombproof with traffic, dogs, big machinery, idiots revving their hot rods as they roar past (special circle in hell for those boys!)

The Mustard Seed has been safely stored in Ken and Cindy’s big garage, but winter is coming and they’re going to need the space. If it doesn’t find a buyer soon it will go to auction – and that will be the end of the saga. I’m definitely at the point with the wagon of “make me a reasonable offer” if you or anybody you know might want an absolutely rock solid little horse drawn camper.